Archive | March, 2016

Why, Cable, Why?

30 Mar

So after a blissful 11 years of being cable free, surviving at first on the fruits of network television and later, Netflix and Amazon Prime, my household recently succumbed to the filth that is cable TV. My husband was disarmed by an AT&T warlock who promised him riches of neverending cell phone data in exchange for a yearlong Direct TV contract. Well as is customary, AT&T was lying and we are currently dealing with big fat question mark on what we owe and yes – STILL NO UNLIMITED DATA, but at least we have some truly awful television to keep our minds occupied.

Well, 98.1% awful. There is Better Call Saul, after all.

Uncomfortable interaction of the week:

So the install guy comes to set it up and is in the process of showing me how to work the remote.

Tech: “Here, press this and choose a show to record”

Me: <Press the guide button and a show called MAN-EATERS OF THE CONGO displays in 60-inch grossness>

Me: “Ha, ew, right?” <awkward laugh in desperate attempt to convey that this is not the sort of thing my family is into>

Tech: <unamused> “Ok, switch channels with this button”

Me: <Change channel to (of course) CAJUN PAWN STARS>

Me: <after several dozen cuss word bleeps I finally find the mute button>

Me: “Hah, oh my, what have we gotten ourselves in to?”

Tech: “yeah.”

Now there are some truly nasty things available via this cable box – things much worse than congo area man eaters and pawn shop language – that we have had to physically remove from even appearing on the guide, but not all of it is terrible.

The best parts of having cable:

  • (The aforementioned) Better Call Saul
  • Fixer Upper
  • My 600lb. Life
  • Jill & Jessa: Counting On
  • Baskets
  • The Americans

It seems like total overkill to have 800-something channels for just a handful of shows, right? We most likely won’t keep the service after the promotional year ends (unless AT&T offers us the same never ending youth deal that they gave Stamos), but it’s here to stay for the moment.

Leave me some suggestions if you have any great cable shows you adore that won’t make me gasp and clutch my pearls.


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